Sometimes it’s as simple as continuing to do what’s working and ceasing to do what isn’t working. The hard part, then, is defining what “working” means to you. I think if it makes you happy then it’s working. If it doesn’t make you happy, it isn’t working.
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This is one more piece of advice I have for you: don’t get impatient. Even if things are so tangled up you can’t do anything, don’t get desperate or blow a fuse and start yanking on one particular thread before it’s ready to come undone. You have to realize it’s going to be a long process and that you’ll work on things slowly, one at a time.